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Fred Watson's Articles in Humour

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The Tickler When Alice Weatherspoon fancied a bit of fish for her tea, she didn’t go to the fishmonger’s or the chip shop, she went down to the river to catch her own. Mind you if the river warden were to catch her fishing without a licence it would have cost her a pretty penny, the fines were ridiculous and could be as high as £2,500. It Comes To Us All I received an extra gift this Christmas. In addition to the usual jumper, multi pack of socks and underwear, I received a car washing kit. You know the kind of thing, wash- leather, sponge, shampoo and polish. I think someone was trying to tell me something. Never mind, it was a handy present and I put in one of the kitchen cupboards for safekeeping, I was sure to find it there. I Want Geordie was sitting in the club nursing a pint of Fed Special and staring moodily out of the window at the rain when his mate Dave arrived. 'Bloody rain,' said Dave as he shrugged out of his jacket and hung it on the back of the chair. 'Aye, talk about summer; it's hardly stopped since May,' replied Geordie. 'That's the British weather for you.'